Archive for November, 2017

Timothy McVeigh

Wednesday, November 29th, 2017

-died on my 19th birthday. Among the 168 people he killed, 19 were children. My full name has 19 letters in it. He was the last person to be executed by The Federal Government of the United States, and the only terrorist to this date to be executed by them. The Oklahoma City bombing was the deadliest terrorist-attack on U.S. soil before 9/11/2001.

Where he was cremated was Mattox-Wood Funeral Home, in Terre Haute, IN. I considered it interesting how close to “Hollywood” and “Show” it is- But this is not to cry “conspiracy!”.

He was executed at 7:14 A.M., on June 11th, 2001- Which is 6939 days, 9 hours, and 11 minutes after I was born.

android “woman”

Saturday, November 25th, 2017

I was having a dream that I was with an android “woman”. I don’t remember much of it. I think I was sad that she was not real. She may have had an expiration “date”– A predetermined lifespan. I’m not sure why she would. I know it seems like Blade Runner, but I don’t understand why she would only live so long, and don’t know if she was even “alive” like replicants seem to be, or mechanical. It seemed like she might be “mechanical”… An actual robot. I woke up to my phone vibrating on the table. At this time, she had started to put her mouth around my fingers, in a sexual way.

I just realized something.

Saturday, November 25th, 2017

It was while I was driving on a road that has one name of Spearsville Rd. The last town before 135 on this road from Bean Blossom is Spearsville. I have to take this detour currently, due to construction. I was going I-65 to Columbus and then west on 46 to Nashville, but this way is the way I usually went- 135. It’s a more peaceful ride. More of a straight shot – not as high speed. Country.

I just realized that this was the route I normally took first, on my route- 135 (State Road). I was going to stop running this route the Friday before the shooting at the Route 91 Harvest concert, and start another that Monday- That I did, but then went back to this route. Stephen Paddock was in room 135.

There is something called October Horse in ancient Roman religion. It is sacrificed with a spear. This shooting happened on October 1st. His name, Paddock- Means an enclosure where horses can run (most often it refers to a place where horses are).

I had made other connections to this – what happened in Las Vegas.

A couple of years before the shooting, 887 days or so, I went to see a girl – who I was with in a Mr. Paddock’s class- In 6th grade. I hadn’t seen her in a long time. She had lots of tattoos, and her first one was a horse. I made a post about this, then, and wrote about taking an order for work when I got back, picking up on Post Rd/Exit 91. It was the first comment in the thread about going to see her- Information I added. The day after the shooting, when at work, on my way home from doing my new route, I made a run picking up at this same location- Exit 91/Post Rd. I rode with a guy that night – nobody had ever ridden with me on a route, from work – his birthday was the same as Jason Aldean’s- The singer when the shooting started.

asses

Friday, November 24th, 2017

I had a dream that involved a “a lot” of what is called “anal sex” (I have technical issues with calling the act sex). I woke up from this. There was also a lot of violence, and courier-ing.

At the end of the dream, someone was shot (out of many), and there was some humor. There was a crab-type creature, and a man said “you’re an alien!”. I am not sure if I wasn’t somehow this crab-like creature.

I went back to sleep, at this time, after going to pee. I didn’t want to yet be awake, as the house I am at is my parents – and my brother, his wife, and their kids are here, and I didn’t feel like interacting yet. I hoped they would be gone when I woke up.

I woke up again to my brother’s wife yelling at her daughter, in a way that I would consider out-of-control, emotional, and emotionally-abusive. She was spanking her. I shook my head, and opened up Instagram on my phone, to see the first post- Made by my brother, holding out in his hand a model-toy of a Romulan Warbird (from Star Trek) that I had gotten years ago, when I was a child.

I made a connection of asses, violence, and now-perhaps some uncontrolled sexuality, as I have never believed my brother made the right choice with this woman. I considered at this time that she was a “horrible person” – for what I just heard. They both have emotional problems and should not be parents. . . Not to say there aren’t worse out there.

I also thought of a female – before sleeping the time when I woke up, before I woke up to my brother’s wife beating her daughter. I remembered, with relating with the dream, something related to “anal” – with her. Once, when I made an expression related to this, the next day there was an article of news- Where she claimed that police checked her ass for drugs. I won’t say how I made the association, in the first place.

My brother and his wife when I went downstairs both claimed, as they were filling their plates, that they don’t eat a lot. They’re both overweight. It’s not really just how much you eat- It’s what you eat, too. It started with his wife asking for special attention – perhaps to redirect from what a horrible person she is… My mom said something about not liking it being cold – happy that it was to be warm, and then my brother’s wife said “I don’t like being fat”, and proceeded to make excuses, saying she was going to work on not being fat (not attacking her for being fat, but their excuses aren’t really satisfactory).

I made this post, without these words in this paragraph. I consider also that “Cancer” is represented by a crab (I dreamt of a crab), in astrological signs. My brother’s wife is in remission from cancer. One of my first reactions to her behavior (more than necessary emotional response, and more than necessary spanking) was to say, to myself, that they would be better off if she just “bit it”.

Blade(s)

Tuesday, November 21st, 2017

I have been curious about the times of my relationships to my exes. In research – I think I remember the first movie that I saw with my first girlfriend. I think it was Blade. It came out on 8/21/1998. This was the first time out that I remember with her. I think her brother and another female went with us. Our relationship was new. I can’t positively remember the details, but I remember seeing this movie around this time, and I remember her brother liking it, and talking to me about it, as if we shared the experience – possibly. I think Katie- Who became my girlfriend, and I talked there in the car at a house. Perhaps her brother and this other person gave us some privacy. Maybe we decided we would have another date, or be together.

I seem to remember we watched Soldier shortly after this. It’s the next film in the list of movies from that year that I remember seeing. Katie’s brother may have come to this one as well, and maybe another girl (or more). Soldier-I recently found, is a “spiritual successor” of Blade Runner, taking place in the imagined universe.

I am actually not sure what I remember– If I watched it in the theater, or at home…But I think it was the theater. I think I wanted to watch it, because of my interest in “robot-human” like movies, like RoboCop, Terminator, etc.

The lifespan of a replicant in Blade Runner is 4-years. After Katie, I had a relationship with Sara, then Alisha- With my mom’s last name, then Marilyn. Without detailing it all, I analyzed the names of these people…writing them down, and looking at them multiple ways. One of the first “orders” that I saw (I was looking for order when I did this) was that the way I had written them the first letters spelled the word “mask”. Relating to 4 years, they were born precisely 4 years apart, using birth-dates of the first and last. Other numbers allow it to relate to in number other things, like the One World Trade Center (and more relates with that, as well).

8/21/2017, 19 years after the release of Blade, there was an eclipse- The first that I witnessed. I was focused on a person, whose first name means “to cut”, around this time, paying attention to synchronicity. She released – she’s an artist – something new on that day, after deleting everything. It was as if my attention to her built up to a point, and it didn’t feel like an accident when she came into the light.

She made a video, for one of her songs, where she is like a robot, borrowing from Westworld, and perhaps others (Blade Runner? Though those are biological robots of sorts). I had, over time built some association to her with Islam. This week as well, other things happened, including Saudi Arabia making a “female” robot a citizen- The first country to do so in the world.

I don’t really tend to think that what I see is absolutely real, much of the time. I think it’s all kind of layered, and in a way like a mirage, sometimes. Not to say it isn’t there for me, or that I don’t, or can’t drink from it, in ways, but I wouldn’t know how to share it. I also don’t expect connection, from this.

The last girl I fell for, in life, was Donna. I met her 9723 days after I was born. Deckard in Blade Runner lived in apartment 9732. 9731 was a dead-line date, for Donna to remove things from her storage, so that she didn’t have to pay for another month, and it was around this that I messed up. Blade Runner focuses on memory (“storage”). 9732 would be the day after this dead-line. Exactly one year from that, I thought I had a heart attack, and went to the hospital. Exactly one year after that, I took it easy that day. The following day of work I delivered one order, to a person with the last name “Hart”, and then went home for the day, as it was a slow day. One year again after (going by the year-year dates, Jan 31st) my last grandparent died, on my first niece’s (or sibling’s child’s)- Anna’s 13th birthday.

I don’t really feel like trying to detail everything, as I don’t have it all in focus right now– How would be appropriate, perhaps. Sometimes less may be more. I also associated Donna to this artist (Taylor), in time, in some sort of way. But I couldn’t name it absolutely. We’re all human, and like and unlike each other, and there are common things that happen with us. Life would have to be made of patterns. I’m not sure about these such patterns, but it is definitely patterned in many ways. I did consider her a “lead singer”- Donna, relating with ‘Prima Donna”- “First Lady” (“chief female singer of an opera”). Donna was also born on a day where a solar eclipse occurred, and I associated her to Islam, as well, seeing for the first time in my mind’s eye (with anyone) a kind of veil over her face (kind of like I couldn’t process how beautiful, and it was as if it was like a wedding-type veil, or at least white, and colors shined through)- But this wasn’t all, necessarily.

Islam means “submission (to God)”. I test, but generally I find wisdom in this word- Itself. I am not sure about following the words of another, blindly, though, and again, have simulated in my imagination points of contention with Muhammad, and various others–Simply by how reality happens to happen, for starters. But Donna was born on the same day (date of a year – May 30th) as the man who purchased the lease to the WTC complex, and while I was with her, before I had knowledge of this, I imagined buildings falling, out of some desire to protect her- Feeling that I would sacrifice a lot…”for us”. There wouldn’t be a second thought, if it was us against…Or us or “them”. This was right after I saw/imagined the veil.

I didn’t have a relationship with her – At least nothing conventionally called a relationship. But we don’t stop having “relationships” with our experiences/memory. I haven’t thought of any way to re-connect with her, after everything. I do love her (that’s unconditional).

God of thunder?

Tuesday, November 14th, 2017

I recognize the word God as singular – God can only be one. Sometimes I feel like I’m acting when I say that (going from memory), but I don’t consider that anything can come before the one true God. It’s always present, in everything, in every process. God is.

But I had a thought last night, while driving- It said “God of thunder”, that I am. I had gotten mad about a movie that had been made that is supposed to be about Thor. I got mad because I felt it was insulting. I didn’t feel it was insulting for bad reasons. It insulted life-itself. It was disgusting. I wrote about it.

As I drove, I didn’t turn on the radio, until about an hour in, or so. Perhaps longer. I don’t honestly remember when I turned on the radio, but the first song that was on was called “Thunder”, by Imagine Dragons.

I can’t say I really wanted to hear it, but I let it play for awhile, because of what I had just been writing about, and had been mad about, that I was still thinking about – and continued to think about.

719, quartz…

Tuesday, November 7th, 2017

I found that the days between the birth of a female and mine was 719, and in research about this this number I noted the fact that the minute and second hand are in the same place on an analog clock 719 times per 12 hours. I considered how long it’s been, and how I tend to still think of her.

I also thought of the first number that I remember remembering in life – that was a compound sort of number like this, 917- Or 9:17 (sounded “nine seventeen”- I remember). 9:17 in Revelation is a verse that my friend pointed to one night when we were experimenting- To see if we were “prophets”. This was the first attempt, and I was the one to attempt to visualize what was pointed to, without knowing, and I seemed to be rather accurate. I have tried to dismiss this on the basis of- That I had an image of this book in my mind, and this was pretty much it- Possibly, but then I have to argue that my friend didn’t know that this was my image (although, again, to argue- It may be common, as it was one of war, and fire). I also later found that this is the only verse that the word “vision” is used in the book of Revelation. My friend also claimed, or claimed to me that my eyes were changing colors, which I as an adult have to rationalize was probably his picking up the colors that exist reflected off of watery eyes, and being excited, and more attentive to the situation (and my eyes aren’t without color, to begin with).

With the girl- She had me hold eye-contact with her for an extended, not-quite-natural amount of time. I have to say- At the time, especially, when I had no idea what was causing certain anxiety, this was especially difficult for me to do, but I did it, uncomfortably. It was the longest I had with anyone. So I have sort of related this, as well.

She is why I bought crystals- Although I never bought a lot, and don’t really “believe” in a lot, either (I like to keep things more simple). Today- After posting about the above- 719 days between us, and 719 meetings of the second and minute hand in 12 hours on an analog clock, I slept, and then I left early for work, and on the way to work I was looking for something in my car- Not finding it, but seeing a quartz crystal that I had bought years earlier, keeping there in my car in a compartment in the door, and then I put my eyes back on the road from this, and saw numbers of 611, which were a kind of reversal of the date as we write it here, 11/6, and 6/11 is my birthday (I considered this first, after the quartz- Which relates closely with timing-devices).

Prior to leaving for work, my parents were on the phone with Apple Support, trying to get rid of some malware. Again- I am staying with them until I might find a new place, that I can live in without feeling intoxicated in a bad way, or other reactions. The person helping them was talking about the back-up device- The “Time Machine”.

On the way to work, I saw numbers 844 align first at a location that I associated with one- Who I associated with her, and who recently zeroed all of her social media accounts out, adding an image of a snake’s tail on the date of the solar eclipse, and then more after. Donna- The one who I refer to being born 719 days after me was also born on the day of one. 844 I had just found to be a kind of permutation of, by using time as a guide to measure the numbers by (60…), the number 524- The address where I met her (Donna). This may be explained by finding that 524 seconds/minutes is 8:44. When I found this correspondence of number, first-recently (I have found it previously), I thought of one, whose last name, Buckles, relates with something being bound/connected. I investigated the last time we talked- I found it was 8:44 A.M.- My sister’s birthday in 2015, was the last message she sent to me (I didn’t respond, for some reason).

I associated the location to the one because of a number of 385 being there- Being the only 385-number that I see on the way to work, from here. It’s on US 52. The next solar eclipse will occur on my parent’s 52nd wedding anniversary. 385 I associated with her as it was on a card by her- That I saw when looking for cards for my sister’s birthday. I had frozen in front of it, not paying a lot of attention consciously- Just stopping. Then I saw her image in front of me, so I looked, and saw 385 inside a butterfly-image on the back of the card, and this led me to question what it meant to her. On a day when I consciously did-this, my car’s alternator stopped functioning, and battery died, leading me to coast down a road, coming to a stop right after passing an address of 385, near Nashville, IN- Where I was to deliver to last that night. I carried the totes with pharmaceuticals the rest of the way, and the first name I remember reading in there as a patient name, in the orders I brought, was Gamble. I had earlier that day also considered gambling- I remembered the one time I did made me feel “dirty”- A bad feeling. Donna- Who I say I kind of associated the one associated with 385 with, where at the location today associated with her (385w outside of Rushville) I saw 844- First associated through a number found through Donna, also is now in Las Vegas- A place associated with gambling.

Also- With 385- I found that the 385th verse of Revelation is 22:1. Taylor (385 associated through) is dating a guy- Who is born on 2/21, which is the 52nd day of the year… I was jealous, in a way, irrationally- The night before a man born 2/21 shot people at the church in Sutherland Springs, Texas. I turned myself off, or tried to, to paying attention. She had released a new song, and I didn’t consider that there was a reason for me to pay attention. I understood I may also be jealous, but I do fight for some kind rationality, in my life. And I don’t really like to waste energy. I do unconditionally love, at this point- But it took identifying love in a different way than I had. I have affection for what is good. Love/God is good, and understanding it, understanding is good. I don’t consider where my attention goes to be good, sometimes. If this person is seeing someone, and it is good- Good. But sometimes, where I would normally not be jealous, I am led into places, or by certain attention, and fall into it. I don’t want to, so I resisted investing my attention to her. I can do it like a scientist, but it’s sometimes hard to stay detached, when things happen so “close”.

On the way back, at about 385W, both my range and time might have been about 345 (3:45).

Back forward, to work, I remember seeing 844 on the loop-I-465 around Indy, at a location that I have associated most closely with her- With Donna. As there was a lot of traffic at this time, I only caught this in this moment, or noticed where I was with- Just after seeing a car with this plate number (and three letters that I don’t remember).

Coming back that direction I remember, later- When going back to the pharmacy after my route seeing numbers 514 on a car prior to this location, associated with her, and 514 I first think of Robert Zemeckis- Who created Back to The Future, as his birthday is 5/14. At the pharmacy/warehouse, after finishing up inside, in my car as I was about to leave, it on- “Head Over Heels” by Tears for Fears came to an end, with lyrics, “Time Flies”.

I saw 8044 another time, near-perhaps the location where I most-associate with her (she used to work there, when I met her). This must have been as I was on my route- Starting it.

Candlebox, “Far Behind” came on just as I passed a location associated with the one- Associated with 385, prior to reaching my first destination for my route (where I stopped by 385 before). This location has her name, and it’s where my alternator was replaced. Also, Associated- Ass. I smacked one on the ass, and she punched me. I was thinking of her in a way that was unique, and in focus, with this in a kind of focus- Prior to the other coming to my attention- There was a case about a guy grabbing her ass, and she was in court over it. This was when-about my hands/wrists got injured (carpal tunnels), and haven’t been the same since.

I sometimes wonder if I am in hell. But I think that would be wrong to assume, or to make a conclusion, stopping there.

Hell means “cover”. Maybe just open the cover? Un-cover….

Seek-truth.

I already know it. But this world is not….

?

I came to 524, going to 844, finding the sum of numbers from the cover of my Bible- First noticing the longest string equaled 23- The first number that I thought I saw something with (perhaps besides 9:17)- Then adding the gematria of letters to the numbers. Cover- Eclipse.

Bible

Monday, November 6th, 2017

I haven’t seen anyone carrying a Bible in awhile. I can’t remember the last time I saw someone out, carrying something that seemed to be a Bible. This time it was as I was leaving the house- My parent’s house; A neighbor’s son (seemingly) was arriving to their house, and as I left he was getting out of the van from the driver’s seat and I noticed a book in his hands, that looked like a Bible.

Last night, I posted images of a Bible on Facebook- Where I had related it with things, and calculated gematria from it’s letters (and adding the numerals/numbers together with the gematria-sums of letters). I had never done this before.

Today there was the deadliest church shooting in history. 26 people were killed (this is the number so far), by a 26-year-old male (he would count as 27 dead, but I don’t like counting killers in the same number).

I wrote about a community with the name “paint”, last night, that is in Somerset County, PA- Where Flight 93 crashed. I related it being where it was, the closest name on the map shown toward a northern border in this county, with the fact that the recent attack in NYC where a “Jihadist” used a truck as a weapon on a bike-path ended with the perpetrator brandishing a paintball and pellet gun. A post I had made just about exactly a year previous to the incident included a road with the name Bicycle Rd that is located very close to the Flight 93 crash site, and I may have seen it before I went to bed, in the same wake-cycle where I was aware of the attack in NYC. But I’m not sure about that. It was near in time. I also found another ‘Bicycle’ road that is in Somerset- The city, in Somerset County, that goes to a place where 219/Flight 93 Memorial Highway seems to have a break of sorts, and then this Bicycle road runs concurrently there with it.

The first eye-witness account that I saw, on Youtube, comes from a Youtuber going by the name- Charlton. He seems to have paint on his shirt, from painting, and the eye-witness seems to have a substance on his shirt that appears (but may not be) like paint.

I found a number of 337 that is a partial “loop” around where the shooter lived. 337 is a number that I have associated with “light” (not to associate it in an exclusive way). In first attempts to research this road of 337- In Texas, I ran across a Ranch to Market Road 337- Which is not the one I was looking for, runs from a place called Camp Wood, to a place called Medina. Medina I recognize first as a city in Saudi Arabia- One with significance to Islam (but I don’t know the whole history). State Highway 337 is another ’337′ that I found. It’s goes between State Highway 16 and US 180 in Mineral Springs. I found it after I was looking at information about salt. I watched a video about an orphaned Opossum, shortly before, as well…and 337 here is right next to Possum Kingdom Lake (I think the song- By The Toadies comes from this). If I measure between State Highway 337 and State Highway Loop 337, Ford Hood is about equidistant between these two (and a little off to the side if a line is drawn), where- 8 years ago, there was the shooting that occurred there, by a Muslim man.

Also- Void

Thursday, November 2nd, 2017

Donna, a female who I met years back, I tend to watch for her. I would have to say it is because there has been “return” enough to do so. She’s interesting/in-sync. Sometimes I think I need to just stop paying attention, anyways. I don’t like the way that sounds, though, or the emotion that might be behind it. Things got messed up. I probably – at the time I met her – should have known better than to be meeting anyone, as I wasn’t in the state to take anything seriously. In-fact, when I met her, my plan was just to try to use her for sexual purposes (how to say), and not be invested, but she was not someone I wanted to “use”- Just once. She was kind of a wake-up call, in ways. I had been “asleep”, voluntarily, after finding something before her. I can’t really say a lot has changed, but I have learned some things. I still often wish I could erase the memory, especially of her’s-of me.

Her family recently died. I found that I made posts around the times of their deaths that I can relate with death. When I met her, her father had died in years prior, and she was still very-much dealing with it, getting emotionally shaken around explanation.

Her mother I found died in 2016. On that day, I posted about an episode of Star Trek- Called “Time’s Arrow”, and created an order with numbers, connecting them where previously they had been separated (in a kind of order-arrangement). She died on 9/09/2016. Time’s Arrow was the episode that I had last watched as of that date, although it had been awhile since I was watching the show; In curiosity, because the date was the anniversary of Star Trek, The Next Generation’s anniversary, I decided to check.

I searched for Donna this morning, I think- This may have been the first time, with reference to the following: In addition to a recently-active account that she operates, one that she had three years ago is now also active. Both her profile image and cover image are black (void).

The date that she uploaded them seemed to be October 11th, 2014. I’m not sure if she was offline on this day. Her brother died approximately 4 years later, on October 12th. He was her last remaining immediate family, from the core- Of her parents. I love her. If I could create a perfect person to be in her life, to be with her, I would. I can’t imagine. I don’t mean to act as if I can feel, or understand. She shared the information about the deaths on October 24th- My dad’s 74th birthday, and on a day when I imagined what it would be like if they both (parents) died, considering it. I say I love her, but again, part of my ‘torment’ involving her is that I knew she was (not to say I am not) troubled in life, and had trouble with relationships with people. I wasn’t expecting to meet someone I might want to marry, and wasn’t ready, or being ready would mean a kind of surrender, and that made me feel weak. Not even to say she would have me. But still, she had an effect on me. I have often just wanted to see her truly happy- To know she was living in love, loved, and was in love with a family of her own (I do this so that I would have a clear reason to release, not that I think it’s my job, or that I am so arrogant or “in-her-life” or can justify myself, but I have found it easy to release when I know that people are well, and on satisfactory paths, if I love them)… I posted about this in Synchronicity, on the day that happened to be when her mother died (last parent). I said that I wished that the next time that I saw her, she had a child. As I seem to struggle with this, with “race”- Sometimes, and identity (group-togetherness), I considered, that I didn’t really want her to be with another- Other than White, but accepted and said “maybe East Asian”- Or something like this.  I received a message sometime after, from an AsianDate site from a profile attached with the name Xing- Meaning “Star”. I hadn’t noticed messages from them in quite some time, and had forgotten I had set up an account. I saw a star through the fog/mist in the sky, and then shortly after this a song by an artist named Vega- “Tom’s Diner” I think was the song, came on. Vega is a star. Donna now lives in Las Vegas. Vega may relate with a “falling eagle”, or “falling vulture”.

I also related her with The Great Pyramid, and 203. I would have to retrace some steps, though. She’s the first person that I associated with “Isis” (or maybe related is a better word here- I did not think she “is” Isis, not that she isn’t somehow spiritually connected to what Isis may have been). She was born on the day of an annular-”ring” eclipse. I met her on 1/23, which, if like a number, 123, can relate with 203 through 123 seconds/minutes being 2:03, but I don’t think that was “it” (as in, everything). 23 is the 9th prime number. 9 is the highest single numeral. 23 in our counting system is also at a “highest” place, before a “zero”, in our timing of 24 hour-days. 23:00 is the last hour before 00:00 (24:00=00:00, on the circle). The 23rd prime number is 83. 83 seconds is 1:23. 123, again, seconds/minutes, is 2:03. 203 was the first number that I considered- To see about the timings this way, finding it linked in ways to 23 – specially.

But, I can’t judge. I don’t mean to judge what is right or wrong, for her. I just want love (including to her/others), because that works out for me. Admittedly it seems simple that we as biological organisms want to continue the path that we have been on, though- What we were essentially made for. So this is not to deny that.

How I might relate

Thursday, November 2nd, 2017

Last night (this-morning) I finished my route 203 minutes into the day. Today something that was once measured to be 203 “steps” or courses high – there was announced there was found an extra “void” (I may have just heard the word, “void”, on the television, after writing it…my father is watching, it was on a commercial for ‘Xfinity’) that was found inside the Great Pyramid. As I was leaving this place a car that I had parked by- The alarm system started to go off, as soon as I left the building, walking to my car, and then it stopped as I passed behind it. After it went off, the lights came back on, without the alarm system going off, and the rear, white-reverse-lights came on, as I was going to leave.

On the way home, I was driving through Columbus, IN, and I decided to take a slightly different path through, which would take me by my sister’s house. She lives off of Taylor Rd, on the east side of the city. As I reached 25th street, where I would then turn right-east to meet IN-46, to go home, on it I noticed I was behind a car with a license plate with numbers of 176- Letters I can’t remember (I didn’t pay a lot of attention). The numbers in front of me in my car, on the odometer were 440106, and the range was 44. 106 as a number I most recently identified with the date that Blade Runner 2049 came out. This relates to ‘Taylor’, in some ways, one being that the name/word means “to cut”, which goes with “blade”. I noticed later-also, that Taylor Rd ends on the north-end with an option to go to a road called “Sawin”- Which I had not seen before, and related with a ‘saw’. On mother’s day, I had just seen the preview for Blade Runner 2049, and as I arrived to my sister’s house, where we were having something for mother’s day, as soon as I got out of the car I heard a power-saw of some kind activate from an unknown location around there, cut something, and stop. The timing was pretty much as soon as I got out of my car, closing the door and heading in, and it was the one time I heard it go. Inside as I walked in there was a copy Hacksaw Ridge (from Redbox) sitting next to the computer, which is located at the entrance to the kitchen, so one walks by as they enter. Next I saw in the living room/family-room a copy of the Bible opened to a page where pages had been removed/torn-out, just after where to starts to talk about the ascension of Christ. In the preview for Blade Runner there was also shown the part where the blade runner- K goes to investigate something he thought was about himself, and pages of a source had been torn out.

176- I recognized, as I met a female, whose father was from Iran, so I associated her with it. Her name’s gematria can be this. She was on my mind recently when I found numbers of Rick Deckard’s (“original” blade runner) badge number (the longest string in it, 263), align with the name- Where I see the name regularly (on my route for work), and when I found a Deckard Church near Belmont, IN, after a “rambling” woman in Nashville, at my stop there for work (where I ended last night, or this morning – She was then in the TV/game-room/activities-room) kept repeating “come sit with us down at Belmont…”. Rick Deckard in the novel Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep was said to be married to someone named Iran. In the film, Blade Runner, 44 seems to be featured on the car that Deckard drives/flies.

Iran- The girl/female who I met who had rooting from there, was born on a day that I first associated with/around Islam, or things around Islam, and the film, District 9, which is about aliens that come to earth, and become as refugees. That date was 8/14. She was my first close-connection with someone from the ‘Islamic world’, in this sense, and the reason I associated the date of her birth, originally to it, was that at the time that I saw the film District 9, released on this date, I read about Ramadan on a day that I had inadvertently fasted (didn’t eat- Something to Ramadan). I felt some kind of spiritual connection to it. Soon after this in time I recall the refugee crisis began, from the Islamic world. I met Rebecca (with Iran roots) a few years later. Her name means “noose”, and the night prior to meeting her, a muscle in my neck got pulled, while at a location with a name beginning in the word Bell, in a town of Bloomington, IN- Where I first saw the name Deckard in life (registering it), on a funeral home near this point where I deliver.

I had, around the time I met her (Rebecca), just started to relate with Norse Pagan symbols, or rather to the story around Odin, and his finding of the “runes”- After hanging from a tree for 9 days. I related it with a dream I had, and I was at this time led to look at this through looking at the etymology of my name.

When I met her, she mentioned the pictures I had uploaded, as I had done so, relating with Odin. She said that her ex was an Odinist, and that he hung himself. This was the first time I had met anyone with this kind of connection, like this- To someone who took seriously such things. Not that I didn’t “take it seriously”. But the story was surprising to me, coming at the timing (pulled muscle, as it was, and my investigating, and her name – meaning “noose”…).

When I began to think of her again, recently- I came to the number 814 later, when I stopped to get nourishment, as it was parked in front of me (on a car’s license plate, nearest/clearest to me). I had just been relating with marriage – I found the dates that my mother and father were married, sister and her husband, and brother and his wife, that the chronological-day-number of each year they were married in totaled 611- Which I related first in life, that I remember, with my birthday (6/11). I have since had knowledge/reference added – that 611 is a gematria in for the word “Torah”- In Hebrew, and that this was the number of commandments/instructions made by Moses. 611/3 I found was 203.6777_- This number as 203 I had found relation to-with before, with Egypt, and with my birth, for one (203 days are left in the year on 6/11). I began to relate “law” (as Torah is related with) and “marriage”. Both are binding/bindings.

One of my first attempts to wright about 8/14, and Iran/Deckard, and Rebecca – recently, when I stopped, I went to Youtube, and found a video with other numbers I was attracted to- A Numberphile video (“real” math study) about the “10958 problem”- Which shows how easily many numbers are broken-down/solved by single numbers, but not 10,958. I was attracted to the 958 part of it, and curious – checked it out. The first number in this video that he “solved” using a method, for an example, was 814.

At some point, soon-later, I found that 611+203=814 (or 611+203.677=814.677). Not that this relates so precisely, as in, I did not marry her on her birthday, necessarily…

Rebecca’s daughter’s name is Roan, who was born 12/25. Roan- I considered at first to mean “Raven”, associating with Odin’s ravens (thought and memory), but Rebecca said she meant it in reference to the Rowan Berry- Something associated with Christ/Christmas.

I watch the show- Vikings. After the main star of the show up to a point- Ragnar dies, his sons and his brother have gone south, in the direction of the Mediterranean Sea, where there is the first introduction of the Islamic Caliphate, and Muslims, and at the end of this episode (I think it was) was the first time that Odin was portrayed (missing one eye, also on a boat over water, in- I think, a vision).

Last night, before work, a man who was parked on the ramp – his battery lost charge. I was the first to offer him a job. He is missing his right arm/it was amputated (war veteran). On his other arm there is a flying saucer tattoo, and a “magic mushroom”. I first saw him on the anniversary of the date that an alien abduction was to have taken place, that was the first widely reported one in the United States (Bruce and Betty Hill), and the night/morning prior, I was considering the loss of- Potential loss of function in my hand, due to carpal tunnel problems. After I saw the man who was missing one arm, at first, I took a walk, and hurt my neck when I leaned forward, and had a thought of my head “popping off”, and later related this with the UFO/Flying-Saucer being a kind of disc, like the Mushroom…This night I had been relating with Divorce; On the way to work I saw something at a road called Division, in Fountain-something (a town), and then when I got to work, I saw a picture on Facebook posted my first girlfriend in Middle School (sort of a first, for girlfriends), whose last name was Irrgang- Which I was told means “labyrinth”, of her parents, now-divorced, with her daughter, at Grandparents day at her daughter’s school. I had her mother for my English class in high school, when I got my license, and got my car from her father, who had rebuilt it. My original teacher had the last name, Stall- She was taking a long leave to have, and be with her child. Her daughter, close to my age, married a guy named Hunt, who was Black (Stall is White- This pairing would be rare from our school/home-town). Her husband and Hunt-both were in ministry. Hunt’s father (Chris is his first name) was a police-officer, and brought a modified Camaro to school, showing it to the students, parking it in the courtyard to be seen. I think the Stall family moved to Huntingburg, IN, which is very near to a location in Jasper where I delivered to at 1111 Church, where the man with one arm now goes to (and others who work under a guy named Tom…I work independently, although I could hire others- I don’t). I spent a lot of time around this area right after I had a kind of “being in a space-craft” dream, that has stuck with me- The dream that I have related with Odin finding the runes, falling- As I saw symbols on my way “down”, from the craft, after feeling like I was hanging first. The only symbol I could understand, or the only one that was centered, in focus, was “love”. I thought the symbols were stars at first, and it was like I was in “hyperspace”. I woke up screaming, and I think my night-guard retainer that I used at the time was in a bad position that made my unconscious think I was choking.

The Great Pyramid, also, is missing it’s capstone. There is another “void”, or 0- pre-related by me, before this.

It isn’t really that this clicked, necessarily, or that I am forcing it to be this way- Some way, related, but I began to write in the spirit of exercising creativity/my-brain.

Labyrinth- Also, I forgot to mention this- When I got to work that night (seeing the people who had the name that meant this), a man posted images of, and related with labyrinths. I was alerted to this post while waiting for orders for work, where I saw the man with the tattoos on his remaining arm…