Archive for April 5th, 2016

Donna

Tuesday, April 5th, 2016

I had dreams where she was in. They were very colorful, when she came into them. More color than I remember in dreams, usually. In the first one, I was with a guy, and a girl, who was his girlfriend, or friend. They were younger. I saw Donna somewhere, and this girl knew Donna. I knew of Donna, and this girl considered that we were friends. She was happy we knew each other. She didn’t know what had happened. I saw Donna, and she saw me, and she smiled, and I smiled. It was awkward. She said “I don’t want to be connected to you”, very stern. I told her “thank you”, and “I’m glad we got a chance to see each other, and for this to be said, clearly”, to some degree or another. It was kind of sad, however. I don’t think she meant never see her, or that she wants nothing to do with me. Perhaps she did, but I took it kind of personally, even if well. I walked away. Disappeared from her. She and the girl left, in the girls car, and the guy wondered what happened. I felt like I had messed up again. The alternative was that she wanted to be clear that this wasn’t some romantic reunion, because we were never really that, outside of a few potential moments. I don’t know.

The odd thing is that I woke up from this dream, and wrote some things down, and then made my way back to sleep in my bed (I had been on the love seat), and I dreamed of her again. Again there was so much color around her. I don’t mean around her, but where she was, there was color vision. Her eyes were bright, and I could see the color in her skin, and freckles, and her hair. There was just a life around her. She talked to my friend, Richard, much of the time. Richard is who has a name like hers, as Richard Donald, while she is Donna Richele. She had been taking medications, for something psychological. She had been somewhere. I kept circling. I was there, near, and then I was away, but not far. I wanted to know where she was, or preferred to, but I didn’t want to become attached, and I was afraid to be too close, because of how I have felt in the past, and perhaps, because I am too weak in my eyes to form a relationship of any sort with anyone, beyond business, and who is already my friend, and I may want more with her.

But I dreamed of her twice. I’m not sure why. I wasn’t especially thinking of her yesterday. It was however the first day I didn’t bring the rock/stone she let me take, with me, since Easter, as I often had it on me since then.

That night, last night/this morning, I received an extra order, for a Laura James, born 7/7/44. Laura, I associate with Laurel, and Laurel with Apollo, and she, Donna, I have associated with Artemis, but also Daphne, and others.

I don’t know.

It’s rare that I continue in the same dream. I know I was trying to impress her, and in doing so, rarely made an appearance, and perhaps constantly changed my appearance